Twiddling My Thumbs….

Obviously you get my point.

There are 27 comments

Add yours
  1. JJ

    LOL!! Yup i get your point. Been following your blog for a while, just tot i should drop a comment now. Light-skinned women and models?? Ridamdiculous!!

  2. kay9

    🙂 Suga, Suga, Suga; m kporo gi how many times? There’s such a thing as obsession, you know. Hang stupid Nigerian business men, i can think of better things to worry myself about. It’s a fckd-up Nigeria and a fcked-up world, but hey it’s ALL we have, and the sooner we all realize that some of our brothers (and sistas) are just plain STUPID, and desreve only to be ignored, the better for us. Ada nne, stupid people will always be stupid people, no matter how much you try to correct them.

    I got your point; i hope you got mine. 😉

  3. eccentricyoruba

    personally, i don’t think Sugabelly should let anything go. firstly this is her blog and she is free to voice her opinions as she pleases. and most importantly by blogging about this, discussion will hopefully be raised. this skin tone thing is most times swept under the carpet, i feel it is something we need to talk about. just ignoring the elephant in the room will not make it magically disappear.

  4. All4Naija

    Hahaha…I am jealous of the business tycoon. Sugarbelly will feel bad about me concord on that. Those girl are not white you know, they are South African blacks.The business tycoon don’t even touch them on some occasions. Live your life.

    I love that man…!!!

  5. sugabelly

    @K9: I get your point. People are going to do what they do no matter how hard you holler.

    But sometimes I like to holler anyway.

    @Eccentric: SO true. This whole black-non black, dark-light issue is a massive elephant in a really small room, and no amount of dancing around with our hands over our eyes is going to make it disappear.

    @all4naija: I am totally jealous of the business man and his damn private jet. I want a private jet too. 😀

  6. enigmaticone

    WOW!!! What exactly is WRONG with the business men preferring light skinned girls? Is it because you are dark skinned? From the picture in the articles, the models are dark skinned!!! but you only choose to highlight your obsession. Firstly, you complain about Dare using an indian woman, next you complain about the black men that prefer light skinned black women. What is your issue really? colour? or the fact that you probably share their preference, and loathe the fact that you are dark skinned? these men did not say anything derogatory about dark skinned women – they only stated their preference. This occurs everywhere in the world. some men prefer blondes, some brunettes, some prefer fat women, some slim.
    Majority of the top black models in naija and the world at large are DARK SKINNED, i haven’t heard a black light skinned wanna be model complain yet. why haven’t you addressed this issue? Oprah, michelle obama, naomi campbell, oluchi, agbani etc are all dark skinned black women. the top naija actresses like genevieve, stephanie, kate henshaw to name but a few are all dark skinned women, why don’t you celebrate them, instead of hating on anyone that is light skinned or white.
    We are all black. you posted a picture of your light skinned childhood ‘crush’ and said he was HOT, did anyone chastise you for doing that? did a dark skinned accuse you of automatically putting him down ‘cos you dared to post a picture of ur mixed race crush? NO!!! Do you date dark skinned guys only? are you forcing someone to love and prefer you? should you not rise above their ignorance, should THEY hold such limited/ignorant views that you claim black men have. Good grief!!! GIVE US A FUCKING BREAK!!!
    How does one’s preference put you down? why are you allowing your obvious insecurity get the better of you?
    There are people being slayed in the niger delta and all you can focus on is skin colour? what do you have against black men who show their preference for white/light skinned women. is it a sin? should they apologise to you for their preference? what alternative do you present? should they spend their money on FAT, DARKSKINNED GIRLS like you, in order to prove they know ur worth? you failed to focus on the distasteful events that was reported, you focused on 2 words – LIGHT SKINNED. Of ‘cos its a bigger issue than the prostitution and immoral acts that were reported, right?. They simply stated their preference, Men will always be men, be they black or white, they always go for a certain kind especially where they have money, and will always state their preference, some could even prefer ‘a fat dark skinned insecure, wish she was white sugabelly’. Again, i’ll advise, loose weight and bleach ur skin, you might then be welcomed into the ‘in crowd’ of most desired women. Better still, you could channel all these energy into getting some much needed psychological help, and be a mentor to a lot of women that are darkskinned, who wish they were light skinned, so that men can desire them too. Trust me, you will feel a lot better when you end this HATE.

  7. sugabelly

    @enigmaticone: Paragraph breaks are the source of all happiness. Seriously yo, double space.

    K, so here’s the deal:

    None of the darkskinned people in this world that have achieved anything ever achieved it because they were dark-skinned. They might have achieved it through other underhand ways, they might have slept their way to the top, heck, they might have even killed their way to the top, but I assure you that no dark-skinned person ever became successful due to the darkness of their skin. On the other hand, I promise you that there are at least TWO light-skinned women in this world that have achieved something (whether it be a simple promotion or megalomanic success) due to (even if just partly) the fact that they are light-skinned.

    Second, I’m happy with the colour of my skin. For you to say that I might loathe the fact that I am dark-skinned only supports the reasoning that there might be something wrong with dark skin to loathe. While there is nothing wrong with dark skin, a large proportion of society seems to think that there is. And while everyone is happy to think what they want, their thinking unfortunately affects those of us that are dark-skinned negatively. I think I have the right to live a happy life on this Earth but how can I when every where I turn every magazine, video and film I see is telling me to try this cream and that acid-potion to get rid of my nasty dark skin and horrible kinky hair?

    It really is a case of live and let live. When society stops telling me that my skin and my hair is bad and needs to be corrected, I will stop pointing out that society is sick in the head.

    Nuff said.

  8. sugabelly

    By the way, just like your Math Textbook, the posts in my blog are cumulative. If you haven’t read what I have said on the issue before, please don’t come and leave a rant on the first post you see.

    I have said in previous posts that for the most part MEN are pretty much immune to or excluded from the whole skin colour issue so bringing up the picture of my friend is irrelevant. He’s a guy. Go figure.

  9. enigmaticone

    lol!!! i see that you pick and choose when it suits you.
    So in essence its okay for a woman to lust after light skinned men, and the dark skinned men should not complain. why can’t you apply that to urself? it is obvious, that this is your own personal problem, i am afraid, there is nothin these men who prefer white women can do for you. You just have to deal with.
    Again stunning/beautiful men and women have achieved a lot, just because they are STUNNING. It’s not a colour thing. That is why u put a picture of your HOT!!! friend as oppossed to ur not so hot friends. You gave him an ‘audience’ which you denied your not so hot friends. GET ME?
    Secondly, my dear, stop misinterpreting stuff, my saying you loathe yous skin colour is because of your obvious obsession with light skinned women. We are all aware that we obsess over things which we really want. It does not mean there’s something wrong with dark skin. You are the one who feels there is something wrong with dark skin. this is why you regard men who ‘prefer’ light skinned girls as ‘evil’. Why can’t you just accept that they might just find them beautiful? in the same way you found ur friend HOT enough to post his picture.
    Again the men are not ur problem, YOU are ur problem. Sort yourself out and stop looking for validation from the wrong people. Better still pray to God that you will wake up ‘yellow’ like Micheal Jackson, and He might just answetr ur prayers


  10. sugabelly

    So I think what you’re failing to realise is that the fact that people point things out doesn’t mean that they must be “suffering from that problem” which is obviously the approach you’re using to analyze this.

    I don’t have to wish I was white to point out the fact that Black men put down dark skinned Black women in favour of light skinned Black women and women of other races. it just is what is happening. And I’m a blogger so I do what I do; I blog about random stuff.

    I’m not “picking and choosing” when to apply this, I’m just telling it like it is.

    Men are not discriminated against based on skin colour in relation to perceptions of beauty but women are. That is just the plain truth. My friend simply happened to be light skinned. He’s not the only friend of mine that I think is hot, but he IS the only friend of mine that I lost contact with since childhood and then re-discovered ten years later. And THAT is why I did a post about him.

    I couldn’t care less what colour he is. Hotness doesn’t discriminate but people do. I think Tyson Beckford is God’s gift to earth and he’s black as hell. I also think Craig Parker is God’s gift to earth and he’s white as hell. The point is, I don’t discriminate when it comes to male beauty. A hot man is a hot man to me even if he’s green.

    But to a lot of Black men, a hot woman isn’t hot unless she’s light skinned or white and this is as a result of SOCIAL CONDITIONING and that is where the problem lies.

  11. enigmaticone

    and how do you propose to change this ‘social conditioning’? by hating on any black man who prefers a light skinned woman, or i daresay, marries one?

    How do these black men put dark skinned women down? by expressing a preference for lighter skinned women? Is the modelling industry putting the vertically challenged/fuller figured women down by prefering tall skinny models? Do you put ‘eba’ down just because you prefer ‘amala’? lol!!!

    If those black men’s idea of beauty is a lighter skinned woman, are they wrong in pursuing that. Is it ‘social conditioning’ that will make you find Tyson Beckford Hot, over Mike tyson for eg?(a presumption). It is simply, your preference.

    We might be unable to change some people’s warped perception of beauty, but it is more important that we focus on our own beauty, and not another person’s perception, as we do not need their validation. – do you feel beautiful? then carry yourself that way regardless of what the next person thinks. We cannot force people to accept us as beautiful, if they don’t think so.

    These men have not done or said anything to put dark skinned women down. They expressed a preference. And to be quite frank, i think you should be pretty ashamed of urself, because you let the preference of a handful of ‘money miss road’ businessmen engaging in an orgy affect you. I will be jubilating that they don’t see me as a ‘piece of meat’ to be devoured. Stop this ‘us against them’ propaganda, and focus on the substance and inner beauty of each invidual, regardless of their skin tone/colour, and their physical beauty – sometimes our attitude and approach is more important.

    I surely would prefer the business men to regard me as ugly, than be any of those girls. I prefer to preserve my self respect. Their validation of my beauty is not needed. THANK YOU!!!

  12. enigmaticone

    lol @ how you justify posting a picture of your ‘HOT’ LIGHT SKINNED CRUSH, but Dare and co. should under no circumstances do same, even if their excuse is something as random as ‘preference’.
    I see you have an eye for ‘light’ things. Its better we call a spade a spade and pot should stop calling kettle ‘BLACK’.

    I doubt if you wld have put a picture up of the same friend, were he dark skinned, fat and ‘ugly’.Just had to be BLUNT!!!

  13. sugabelly

    @enigmaticone: Um… okay… so would you have preferred it if I had written a post about my friend whom I have not seen for ten years and then posted the picture of a completely different dark friend? How does that make any sense? The post was ABOUT Gerry. I can’t do a post about Gerry and put Bashir’s picture there. The point is people on my blog don’t know my friends and if I’m doing a post about one of my friends and I decide to put up a picture of them, it HAS to be their picture.

    You’re argument about Gerry’s picture makes absolutely no sense. That’s like saying that I should do a post about my mother (who is light skinned by the way) and post a picture of Naomi Campbell and claim she’s my mother.

    Pick another example to hold up your argument. The one you have now has shaky legs.

  14. enigmaticone

    Thanks for revealing that you mother is lightskinned – i can slowly build a background picture in order to understand, where your self hate stemmed from. I presume your dad is dark like charcoal, the same way both my parents are. Even your dad failed to accept the beauty of a dark skinned black woman. Thankfully, my dad did.

    My point exactly – in the same way you see my arguement regarding your friend (Gerry), as senseless, is the same way i have been trying to make you see how senseless and unecessary your arguement about Dare and the business men is.
    I had to turn the tables round for you to understand it.

    According to you;
    Dare uses an Indian woman in his video = putting black women down, promoting self hate etc… without taking into consideration the fact that his wife is black – dark skinned. oh no, according to you he is sending a message to black women (his wife included) that we are ugly, right. you reached no other conclusion, but that. Ridiculous? you tell me

    Business men preferring light skinned BLACK women; ditto.

    But; Sugabelly posting PICTURE OF HER OLD MIXED RACE FRIEND,CRUSH/EX BF = I have not seen him for 10 years so the whole world needs to see how HOT he is right?

    You have a lot of friends, and i’m sure via facebook and the like, you may have reconnected with a whole lot of them and did not put their picture UP nor feel the need to randomely talk about them bar one – Gerry and of ‘cos he is light skinned (ur obsession).

    Unfortunately for you, He was mixed race/light skinned and you claimed he is HOT!!! Does this mean you are putting him above dark skinned men or your dark skinned frinds/ex. How do you expect that dark skinned brother who probably likes you, or is toasting you to feel. How do you expect other dark skinned men to feel when you put up a mixed race/light skinned black man’s picture on ur blog – stating that he is the ideal for ‘beauty’ ie HOT.
    This is exactly how you attack/chastise blackmen who dare to show a preference for a woman not ur shade, who dare to use white/indian women in their video, who dare to love a light skinned/black woman, who dare to marry them. GOSH!!! Please give this men a fucking break! They cannot apologise for their preferences, just as you cannot apologise for flaunting your friend Gerry’s picture, just for the purposes of wanting the whole world to know that you have a HOT LIGHT SKINNED FRIEND. How superficial of you!!!

  15. kay9

    Cut it, folks, just CUT IT OUT. I checked back here when i saw 19 comments, only to realize its a diss argument getting hot. Sheesh.

    @enigma: Point taken, bro (or is it Sis?); the stupid businessmen don’t look so stupid anymore.

    @Suga: Its yo blog, babe; you don’t owe any explanation to anybody. Period.

  16. sugabelly

    Okay so this is getting annoying. Listed Enigma. You do not, and I repeat DO NOT know ANYTHING about me, so give it rest. You CANNOT base ANY of your arguments on me because you do not know. Period. My father is probably ten times lighter than my mother is. Everyone in my family is super light skinned so again, your assumptions were wrong.

    @K9: Point taken. I was getting tired of this baseless argument.

  17. enigmaticone

    @K9 – I understand that it is a bit back and forth. However, i am in agreement with you when you say its her blog,and she can write whatever she wants in it. I hope also that you will agree with me when i say the same applies to those who choose to leave comments, else she would not allow them. Thanks.

    @SUGABELLY – I see that the plot deepens, which perhaps helps in butressing my point. You were the only dark skinned girl amongst light skinned relatives; One can only imagine the insensitive/unkind remarks/comments the young sugabelly had to put up with.

    Perhaps you were adopted? i don’t meant this in a rude way, i ask because you said ur dad is 10 shades lighter than your light skinned mum, and you are dark skinned. I don’t claim to know you, but i have always suspected that your obsession with this topic stems from terrible experieces that you had to endure and probably still struggle with.

    I will strongly and sincerely advise that you find acceptance vis a vis the root cause of your issue with light skin/white women, and stop blaming all the black men who have rightly or wrongly fallen at the feet of these women for putting you and black/dark skinned women down. Hopefully you’ll find answers and move on.

    I have to add here, that i am both shocked and pleased, in equal measure that you can find an arguement baseless and tiring. this implies that you are slowly getting to the point i have been trying to make – That this whole topic is baseless and unecessary, as you only seek to condemn indiscriminately, without actually knowing these people and there is solid basis for this condemnation aside from skin tone. In the word of the wise man; it is like a chasing after the wind’ – everything is meaningless, ask King Solomon, he’ll tell you.

  18. Ada

    100000000 gbosa to egnimaticone!!!!!
    I would have written this in your blog but its private.. as I vowed not leave a comment in sugabellys blog. but I had to break my vows to give props for such a beautiful argument you have made..can i get an invite to your

  19. Ijaw

    @enigmaticone: Sorry to disappoint you. The argument is NOT BASELESS AT ALL! This is not a joke. It is not also just a case of “personal choice”, I personally find that excuse insulting.

    You should really get off your high horse and stop throwing baseless insults right, left and centre. You are a prime example of why Nigeria and the Black man are where they are: cheering the Emperor and his New Clothes!

    @Ada: Check this out, it may improve your mind.

  20. MKhalid

    Even forgot what bought me here, my head is hot now, all these arguments that happened between the blog owner and the “enigmatone…” are not necessary.

Post a new comment