My Lack of Self Control

Was going to do Groundstreet Radio tonight, but lost my mojo. I’m depressed and scared because I haven’t been depressed in a while, and the last time, it was horrible. It is something that I can’t seem to shake. I have researched different ways of getting rid of it, but the only one that jumps out at me at the moment is microdosing psychedelics. I’m going to research it further, but it sounds good at the moment. Read more at if you are interested yourself. If this is something that you are going through too, I wish I could help more than that – because I understand the struggles you are going through – but I can’t. Click Here to hopefully find a way to help you relieve these symptoms, however, as it is not impossible to finally get your life back on track. You could alternatively check out websites similar to to see if you can find the right solution for you.

Since I started school in America I’ve gained 100 pounds. It seems unbelievable yes since I’ve only been here for about six months, and besides, I don’t look at it, but it’s true. Every effort I’ve made to lose weight has tanked, and instead, I’ve just gained more. Yesterday, in a fit of desperation (my ex-boyfriend is coming here in a few months, and in order to win him back I can’t let him see me like this), I resorted to my last hope, my secret weapon, the BEYONCE diet.

Yes, the infamous diet that made Beyonce skeletally thin in just under a month for her Dreamgirls role.

Last night I went on a rampage.

21 x (2 tablespoons of Maple syrup + 2 tablespoons of Lemon Juice + 1/2 teaspoon of Cayenne Pepper + 8 ounces of water)

If you’re any good at math, the answer is: Yes, I made twenty-one bottles of the stuff and stashed in my fridge.

I am not going to eat any food for the next seven days.

My starting weight was 222.2 lbs.

I measured my body, and wrote down my measurements, I shan’t post them here until they’re within a decent range, but I can say this. My hips now measure 45.2 inches around… oh dear. I am not only a thigh monster but a hip, tit, and tummy monster too.

I need everyone’s prayers on this one. I need help!

There are 5 comments

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  1. Today's ranting

    You going too extreme baby, do you have to do this to win him’ve gotta love uurself first na.Think about the health implications ooooooo.No food for seven days? Baby,I guess u joking.Pease tell me u just pulling our legs. DONT DO IT!!!

  2. Zena

    your me, I’m you,

    so is this working? I mean the fast/purge?

    I bought the book and I still don’t have the courage to do it, I like things in my mouth(no pun intended) and just drinking is still hard for me to think about

  3. sugabelly

    @today’s ranting: Sorry, but I HAVE to do this. My boyfriend is going to be here in two months; desperate times need desperate measures.

    @zena: It’s scary I know, but the hardest part is the first three days. The pepper will keep you from feeling particularly hungry, but the feeling of not eating for that long is very strange. You will feel almost compelled to put something in your mouth. I suggest gum, lots of gum. And brush your teeth more often. It helps your mouth to forget that it wants food

  4. Anonymous

    222.2 lbs? wow you’re heavy but I’m sure you can do this. You need to drink that stuff well & run a lot. And I mean a LOT. Try running every day, twice a day. One in the morning before breakfast and another maybe 40min walk to 20min run after dinner. I tell you in 2 weeks you can be 150lbs.

  5. sugabelly

    @anonymous: I hate running!! I can’t even run! I’m too heavy to run. I can’t even bend over. It’s terrible. But I’ll try. I’ll speed walk on the treadmill until I can run.

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